Friday, 19 April 2013

The Poor and Penniless

Hi all,

As i am sure just like me, many other students have started to notice their wallets and purses getting ever so light in the last few weeks, their bank balance hitting that special number that all student know as end of the line and banks know as overdraft limit. This is because it is the end of the term, meaning student loans go in soon! Which you would think would be a godsend and it is, but it also means as i have found out that the weeks reaching up to this fantastic date are difficult to say the least.

Suddenly everything seems so expensive, the pub prices are more extortionate than normal and the fags are just not hitting the right spot, mainly because you asked the person at the counter for the cheapest ones they had and came out with a brand almost unpronounceable.

So i am going to give you a few tips to help you keep busy even though you have no money. First i suggest if possible a return to the parents house, That way you don't have to pay for food or heating which are the main spend for students next to alcohol and fags.

 Second ask your parents for money to buy alcohol and fags. Depending on the type of parents you have perhaps blur out the specifics of what you need money for. A good tactic if your parents won't go along with the answer of 'stuff' is to cause a distraction, ask them for the money and while giving an answer knock something over or quickly change subject to something more exciting, then after revert back to the money and a lot of parents will have thought you gave a good enough reason already. Or the third option lie and say its for something important like pens because everyone needs pens.

Once you have spent your free money and are hungover, bored and broke then comes the next few ideas. Perhaps get some equally poor friends together and... wait for it....... play monopoly!!! I bet a few of you went 'urgh' in your heads just then. But don't knock it! i love a bit of board game fun and i am not a monopoly snob cluedo and other ones are allowed to! But you're in for a funny time playing with your friends and maybe you can create some sort of strip version and make it an over 18's kind of game. But either way board games win and are free and its not like you're are doing much else.

My next idea... movies, i would say movie nights but don't limit yourself to just nights, chances are if you're broke and bored then im guessing you have quite a bit of free time, movie days my friends are the way forward! Maybe whack on the twilight saga and see who dies of boredom first! Although that one is normally quite a short game! But yes dear readers remember films are your friends!

I also researched things to do with no money so will tell you some of my favourites, start a blog... don't do this one, people hate people who write blogs,  Practice origami because that is a skill that will get you through life and making shapes is, well my favourite thing to do next to starting a compost bin which was also on this list, seduce you partner... much more my sort of thing, Take a nap which i do when i have money so that's obvious, Turn on the water sprinkler which is riveting,  hold a baby hopefully with permission from the parents and my favourite one... write your will because after doing the shit things this website suggested there clearly isn't much left to do in life.

My final point which should of been my first point thinking about it now, is to read my blog!!!!! because i like getting the page views and you know you're in for a good time with these!! I mean who doesn't appreciate being told how to spend their time after all....

Anyway hope you enjoyed reading.


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